Suga Shocked By Brazilian Booty

“When we were doing the pictures and videos wearing the trunks, I’ve never seen a guy that looks like he got a BBL,” O’Malley exclaimed. “Alex Pereira’s ass is bigger than a Miami b—ch’s BBL. I was in shock, wait till you guys see it. No Diddy, wait till you see that wagon. Holy s—t. If I didn’t know better, I might’ve f—king jacked off … He’s eating. Whatever the f—k his coach is eating, they’re eating. I wonder what he weighs, he’s gotta be 250.”

O’Malley concluded, “Holy s—t, that was mind-blowing. I looked at his butt for like 7 seconds.”

Well … at least we’re objectifying male athletes now? Is that progress?

At any rate, Pereira will debut his Heavyweight figure on the big stage versus Ciryl Gane, who will hold a slight edge in reach over the Brazilian but match his height. How exactly Pereira’s power and speed translate up a weight class remains to be seen, but it’s one of the most interesting questions leading up to the UFC White House.